It's been almost two month since my return home from my mini Euro expedition. I cannot deny encountering a massive Europe hangover after being back in Malaysia. Reality check!!! My return home had put me in dissatisfaction as my journey to take on the world seemed to be unattainable due to the 3rd world country we reside in. But of course nothing is impossible yet only time was required.
I had been down for more than a month, desiring to be in back in Europe or elsewhere rather than stuck practicing something that im not interested in. Pressure mounts me as peers and family had questioned why am i not working yet? Well how can i be someone that i am not? How can i proceed to do something that i am not passionate in? Im done pretending what that i am not!!!
Graduation Day had just went by. After 5.5 years of studying, i conclusively received my Bachelor of Mechanical Engineering (hons). I do not regret taking this course hence of the exposure that i had, the people that i met, the life experience thay i gained and most of all it had sharpened my mechanical mind only to discover what i really wanted in my life. All in all, i did it for my beloved parents as they had been supporting me through the years. Once, about half way through my years in UNITEN, i had requested my dad that i could not take anymore of this course as it was getting more complex and complicated. My dad responded with full of support and just saying just to finish off my degree. Since that day, i vowed to complete it. From that i learned to complete what i had started and my determination to hold on to a commitment. An advice from my academic advisor had changed me into whom i am today. She told me to expand my network within my course so i can achieve better or at least to survive with my academics. I had been less conservative since then, and had consumed more knowledge from others by forming a study group and finding tutors among friends, in my definition 'Parasite'. It may sounded negative, but the friends that i had made i would cherish forever as a way to say thank you. I would say half of my degree belongs to my friends that had helped me along the way in accomplishing the certificate that i have today.
Some would ask why did i go through with it? Well there was no one to blame, only to say that i was fickle minded and indecisive of what i want during those period of days. Growing up as the youngest boy in the family, most of my decisions had been made since during preschool. perhaps i was too pampered to know what i want or perhaps i was not revealed to other fields beside science related. Yup, i grew up in the 90's era where science in Malaysia was growing fast and seemed to be the only way to be successful in life as opportunities had widened. Even during my secondary school, for those who did not yet made a choice and had a good result for PMR were put in the science stream classes automatically.
Alhamdullillah that Ramadan had cleared my mind spiritually. I only need to believe and to be patient to achieve my real goal in life. After conversations with friends, wise individuals and observations, i can only understand that i need to execute with what i want in life to be happy ever after. Only time will tell. And after all that, it all came down to qualifications and experiences in the related field, which i had none, only personal experiences which was not presentable enough. And without that, money was always the factor. So therefore, i may need to get a decent job for a year or two to build the foundation of my dreams. One step at a time. It's healthy to have a plan rather than those that does not have any. InsyaAllah i can achieve it.
